Outtakes

While on tour, I told audiences how long the original submitted manuscript was before getting to the version finally published by Caitlin Press. One version was at least 118,000 words. The manuscript that went to press was around 80,000. How did I end up with 40,000 words of outtakes?

I made cuts for so many reasons, but mostly to ensure that the story was moving forward. That’s one reason that a lot of Walker’s scenes didn’t make it. They were lovely and descriptive, but they didn’t add to the “why” of the story.

Here is one example of an outtake:

“Mostly he saw bears. He watched a mother and her cubs trundling up and over the hillocks of dried slash in an old clearcut. Berry bushes grew out of the destruction. He ate from these sun-stroked bushes too when he could, although he was conscious of the bear’s need.

He loved to see evidence of these secretive animals in spring. When the club-like yellow skunk cabbage flowers began to poke through the muck, he knew they’d be out of hibernation soon. The foul smell of the skunk cabbage pleased him. And if any snow covered the ground the yellow hoods seemed to generate their own heat and melt a patch around them. The bears came to dig at the fresh plants, eating their roots, as if they contained something to revive them for a new season. The Haida named that time for them. Taanaay skinxa dii or Bears Awakening. He’d been told that name once and the words had never left his mind. He felt that awakening every year.

The shiny, waxy skunk cabbage looked so inviting, that he often thought of eating it himself. But he knew the leaves were poisonous in the plant’s full-grown form. Tiny needles irritate the throat and have choked people to death. Someone had told him that too, somewhere in the jumbled, ancient, faraway part of his life. When he craved green, he waited for the spinach-like wild rhubarb plant instead. He’d gather the leaves and cook them with steam. 

He liked to think of the bears and looked for their smooth and cozy hollows tucked into the trees. Once he’d watched a young bear shimmying up a huge cedar trunk to a hole 15 feet above the ground. If only he could crawl into such a high perch where he’d be safe to watch the world go by, maybe he’d stop all this moving around.”

What do you think?

Should I have kept this in? If you are interested in seeing more A Room in the Forest’s outtakes, let me know! I’ve got thousands of words to share.

By the way, in case you missed the news, my tour was cut a little short because I had to have my gallbladder removed! I had an attack on my last day in Prince Rupert and ended up having surgery in Terrace. All is well. Friends drove my car back to Chilliwack and I flew after being released. I’m sorry Quesnel! I’ll have to rebook for another time.